Week ending 6/30/13 - Reflection

Since I am losing my mind it is even difficult to look back on the week and remember what I did. I sit here and really have to think. I was supposed to go to Sue R's for dinner on Tuesday but she called to tell me she wanted to go to the city council which reminded me that there was something I did on Monday which was why we set it for Tuesday in the first place. I met the missionaries to visit a couple. She is a member by birth and he knows Owen from school and Barrett and Michael C from musicals. It was a nice visit. The missionaries are frustrated because they can't get him to go past the intellectual exercise to sincerely want to know if it is true for himself and for the greater desire to know God's will and plan for us. I prayed this week that he would want to change his hear to real intent. Maybe one day.

Tuesday I stayed at home and wasted the night. I am caught in the place between guilty and letting my back heal. It isn't getting much better and When I get up to do stuff...it's hurts worse.  I probably did the same thing on Wednesday but I can't really remember it :(.

 Thursday Greg came home from house sitting and was here after my visit with Sue which was very nice. We talked about family history and an upcoming health event she is having. She is one of the strongest people I know.

On Friday Greg was back to house sitting and I was on my own again. I am lonely and happy at the same time but wasted too much time on the couch. Discovery number two: the couch has the same effect on my back as the car seat. Note to self: don't sit on the couch for more than 20 minutes at a time.

 Saturday...stretching, icing, watching movies. Wondering why I am wasting so much time? Spent time feeling guilty and sitting on the couch actually made my back worse. Note to self: do something productive.

 Sunday the answer to my prayers...Sunday School was about the second coming. She asked what we would go home and do differently if we knew Christ was coming. The lesson was about the fact that we are doing what we need to be doing and rejoice and not be frightened. Lesson:  do those things that I have been asked to do...what am I waiting for. Family history; service; relationships; personal history; time with family.

 Sunday night...empty nesters potluck. Yep it is the stage I am in. Was the youngest there but had fun.

 Sunday...awesome day of reflection, discovery and learning.

Before I went to church I watched a Mormon Message about a girl applying the same scripture that Joseph Smith did to know the truth. I love this because as missionaries it illustrates that we are really just inviting people to find out for themselves so great is our faith that Heavenly Father will answer our prayers and the Holy Ghost will testify the truth of all things. Today in Sacrament meeting Elder Clements filled in for Lennie who was supposed to speak but he wasn't well.  Elder Clements goes home this week. I was glad to hear him he was to share the Joseph Smith story and he did through the story in this video. He did I a very nice job.  Then Pres. Sellers spoke on seeing the finger of God in our lives.  I have been so blessed because I now see the hand/finger of God in my life everyday. He really is intimately involved in our lives.  Then in Sunday School the answer to my prayers...how to be more thoughtful with my time...everything is in preparation for the coming of the Savior. If we are doing these things everyday then we are ready and not fearful.  The mundane is necessary but with the attitude of preparation our attitude can be much different and what we choose to do can be totally different as well.  then on the finally hour a combined meeting was on family history. The Taylors did an awesome job by using people as the visuals as they told stories of families that re missing people and how they found them.  It was a great visual.   A going to take the time to plan my evenings to do these important things I should be doing and can be doing with my time.

This evening I feet to the empty nesters dinner. It was fun. It helped to talk to a few of them.  I miss my boys. They are men and I still want to be the mom. I am but they will make their own lives now and will share those things with the loves of their lives just as I do.  Not their mom.  I remember that about me and my mom but now I know that is where I am. It is not bad, it is how it's supposed to be but I guess I am just surprised at how quickly it has come.