As you have read by some of my latest entries, I am in a moment of self reflection. Yesterday I was in a position to tell someone why I have worked practically my whole adult life. Now for many of my friends, this is just a given, two income families and all of that, but for my LDS friends and the counsel that we have received from our leaders, a mom should be free to be in her home and raise her children. This was my wish and desire and for many, many years and I resented that I was not able to do that.
What I have realized over the years, is that I could have stayed home and forced the issue, lived on assistance, etc. to make it work, but my upbringing would not let me.
My mom was a stay at home mom for the first five years of my life. I remember the idyllic picture in my head.....the house clean, dinner on the table, everything in its place. At five that all changed when my dad got mugged and was permanently ill after that and my mom went to work. She, like me, was gone 12 hours a day. Everything changed. She held it together well enough for the five years before my dad died, she remembered when the school pictures were and we were still dressed alike and "put together".
What I remember about all that was her repeatedly telling Gwyne and me that we had to have our education. We needed to be able to support ourselves if anything ever happened. Once I joined the church, I heard the same counsel from President Spencer W. Kimball telling young women to get an education, be home with their children, an educated mom educates a whole family, etc. and if anything happens, she would be prepared to take care of her family. I followed the counsel and have been grateful everyday that when I did go to work I was an a professional position that could support my family.
After all these years Owen and I are a true team and my boys have seen that transition...for better or worse. Time will tell how their upbringing will manifest in their lives.
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9 years ago
You have been a great example to your sons.
ReplyDeleteI hope that's how it turns out Carrie :)
ReplyDeleteI agree with Carrie. I don't know that the boys have always given you the respect and appreciation that you deserve. However, it is my sincere hope and belief that the day will come when they will realize how much they owe you for making sure they had a secure life with food on the table and a home and a warm bed to sleep in, as well as the strong testimony you have always shown to them. You have given them physical and monetary support but also emotional support and a fabulous example of character, morals, and spirituality. Despite all of the challenges you have faced, from difficulties with money, to troubles between you and Owen and problems with the boys, you have never lost your faith and your testimony. At times I know that the only thing you had to keep holding on to was the Iron Rod, but you DID hold on and never let it slip from your hands. The boys, and all of those who know you, will recognize that and appreciate that someday, if they don't already do so now. (And I believe that they already do, at least a little) You are an incredible example to me of someone who has never lost her footing on the straight and narrow path. No matter how rough and thorny the way, you have kept your eyes straight ahead on the goal and kept moving, even if it was very small, slow steps. I do not know very many people (I'd say I could count them on just one hand) who I can honestly say have never taken a major fall or diverted from the path in some way or another. Your reward will be great and I will be very happy for you when you receive it. I only hope that I will be worthy to be in your association when that time comes.
ReplyDeleteCinda Marie,
ReplyDeleteI love you and think you give me more credit than I deserve, but I appreciate your unending support and encouragement. It is I who admire you...to do all that you do and the strength you have exhibited. I am promised in my blessing that I will be reunited with my friends and family and I know without a shadow of a doubt that we will be together. Heaven will not be heaven without you.